Kinky Black History Month

POC and Diversity in Kink

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Diversity, n. “Noticeable heterogeneity.”

Heterogeneity, n. “The quality of being diverse and not comparable in kind.”
Heterogeneous, a. “Consisting of elements that are not of the same kind or nature.”

The number of times POC are faced with “the same kind or nature” in kink is far too numerous to count. Unfortunately, that kind we see more often than not does not include us. Yet, here we are, in full colors and kinky.

chocolate-pie-chartPeople of color contributed 92 percent of our population growth in the past decade and currently make up 36 percent of the U.S. population as a whole.

Black Americans make up 13% of the population. That may seem like a small percentage until you look around and see us everywhere, from sitting at work next to you to sitting in the Oval Office. So why are we not portrayed more across the kink spectrum?

For example, there is a widely-known BDSM/fetish (“erotic”) photographer with a website on which there are 116 models, only 3 being POC (and 2 were black males who were merely sitting in the background of the images). That’s a whopping 2.6% of black representation.

What diversity is NOT

BM/WW —» Points are not awarded for the lite (and sometimes controversial) version of “diversity” shown by pulling from the ever-abundant and overflowing stash of black-male-fucking-white-female pictures. We get it. You have the typical “black bull” fantasy and quietly hope some of the stereotypes are true while holding tightly to the hope that some of the others are not true… you know, the scary ones. We get it. But that’s a fetish.

Jungle fever —» Another phenomenon based upon the ethnic, but more often racial, fetishisation of a people, jungle fever does nothing to uplift people of color.

Token gestures —» Approaching a POC with lines like “Wow, I’ve never spanked a black subbie ass” or “I’ve always wanted to play with someone black” or “I love black men/women/other” [1] is a poor way to approach a person you should believe deserves the same respect as others and [2] is assumptive in that we should be either impressed or flattered you would shine such light upon us otherwise less-worthy beings. (Refer to “How NOT to hit on kinky POC” by Mollena Williams.)

Excuses abound

Shifting one’s responsibility is oftentimes along the same lines as feigning ignorance. But in life, flattery and ignorance will only get one so far. Understand the frequently-used excuses are being devalued more and more as the population force of POC greatly increases, both in vanilla, and comparatively, in kink. Excuses like:

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  • It’s rare to find black people in/doing/who are…
  • It’s hard to find black people in/doing/who are…
  • I didn’t know black people were into…
  • There are no black people in my area.
  • No black people ever approach me.

Awareness & recognition vs acknowledgement

It is not enough to be aware that POC exist in the alternative lifestyle realm. Also, recognition is a “state or quality.” While both are to be commended, both denote passiveness, the trait of remaining inactive.

Acknowledgement, v. “Declare to be true or admit the existence or reality or truth of; report…; express…; accept…

Now that is a bold action statement. Considering, as cited above, that in just a few short years, this country (USA) alone will be comprised equally of white and non-white inhabitants, we all should find it imperative to begin fully embracing others, especially in this lifestyle we declare to be inclusive and accepting of many differences.

Call to action

So what can a non-POC do to help increase diversity in kink? Plenty, both large and small! Here are a few ideas.

  • actionIf you showcase image galleries, include at minimum 1/3 (up to 1/2) images that depict POC in a positive light. Do the legwork (and it’s not much) it may take to find pictures of us.
  • Write an article to show you care about diversity. Be sure to avoid using backhanded praise (“Black people are attractive like us”) or backhanded apologies (“I’m sorry you don’t feel included”).
  • Create a welcoming environment. If I visit your site and see no representation of POC in kink, I must assume you don’t care to portray us, thus don’t really care about us or about diversity. I certainly would not feel welcomed in your domain. Welcome us into your home (figuratively) just as you would anyone else.
  • Avoid excuses. As above, excuses are no longer viable in this changing world of color in which we live.
  • Showcase us. Showcase galleries that highlight us (in a positive way) and include special sections of publications (books, blog postings, etc) featuring POC and issues we face.
  • Pay us. That’s right — money talks. If you have ever paid for writers, models or other, then you must be willing to pay POC as well.
  • Make a special call to us. If you are sitting by the phone and watching the door for POC to come flocking to you, it’s not going to happen. Be proactive and genuinely put out an open call, special request for the inclusion of POC in your projects. Tip: adding a small byline deep in a website does not count much as a genuine effort.
  • Avoid baiting and questioning POC specialty groups. Munches specifically for POC, sites that solely target black issues, projects like Kinky Black History Month…. these things are necessary now and will remain so until the day we no longer have a need to discuss diversity, because it will be so native to us that seeing all types of people across the kink spectrum will be nothing much to talk about. That.

Kinky Black History Month is a collection of things kinky, erotic & touching.

It is the celebration of POC (people of color) with a focus on those who identify as Black or African-American.

For 28 days, know that we exist, some of us are kinky and all of us are worthy.

For the remaining 337 days, know that we exist, some of us are kinky and all of us are worthy.

Many thanks go to Sir Black Ice and friends papislut & Master Alexander for your continued cheerleading and footwork, those who have provided express permission to include their works here and those who freely offered resources, ideas and input otherwise.